“When people hurt you over and over, think of them like sandpaper. They may scratch you and hurt you a bit, but in the end, you end up polished and they end up useless.” Chris Colfer.
Living by what people think of you, or in agony over what people have done to you, is an unwise decision. Other people’s opinions and what other people have done to us in our pasts is not even a valid way of determining who you are as a person. Only you know who you are, people can only see what they allow themselves to see of you and it’s usually based on their own knowledge and experiences in life. I have learned, when I tell someone something about myself, in order for them to understand what I’m saying or to connect with me, they’ll think of a similar experience in their own life, which is okay, I guess, but its not going to be exactly like MY experience, because they are not me and I am not them and they did not live my experience. You also have to factor in other people’s belief systems and their moral code and how they were raised… which can get messy when it comes to people judging you. Your identity, who you are, is determined by you, only you can judge you and only you can change you… and you are the only person who matters. You decide who you are and what you do in your day to day. Make your decisions about you by yourself and only then can you find peace and happiness within yourself. If you try to do what everyone else is doing (or what you THINK everyone else is doing, because your perception of everyone else could be extremely inaccurate) and not make your own way or make your own path, you’re more likely to fail. Make decisions for YOU, make life work for YOU, take risks for YOU, because no one else will do it for you and no one else will make it just like you.